“Ahh the struggle to not be a f$ck boy”
Three different men have said some version of this to me in the past year, and I want to make something very clear.
IT IS SO EASY TO NOT BE A F$CK BOY
1. Do some introspection and figure out how your feeling and what you’re looking for out of a relationship with someone, sexual or otherwise
2. Communicate where you’re at with the partners you are involved with as soon as possible.
3. Be honest especially when it is clearly requested
Now, I haven’t read enough bell hooks to give you a dissertation, BUT I know she’s done some talking about forth wave feminism and how it’s time for us to teach men and boys emotional literacy.
I am sorry that society has taught y’all masculinity is unwavering strength and limited emotions.
It’s the truth. We have to do some work in that department. I do what I can to help young boys learn to express and work through their emotions while teaching, but how are we supposed to address this epidemic with grown men?
I don’t know the answer, but men, y’all need to start working on it, because your partners and friends deserve it.
Y’all go listen to Amanda Seales’ podcast Small Doses. She has an episode calles “Side Effects of Being a F$ck Boy” that can begin your education.
Really just listen to anything by her.
And be kind to your people